Handmaidens greet guests and offer smudging. Any guest wanting a drum or rattle is offered one. Guests are invited to construct a prayer bundle, write wishes for the couple on a ribbon to tie it with, and hold it to be gathered in a blessing basket. Michael plays harp as guests are seated. The space has been cleared and consecrated prior to the ceremony. An altar contains the 4 elements, rings, blessing baskets, and handfasting cords.
Jill enters the sacred space,
signaling the beginning of the ceremony.
Drummers at the house herald the entrance of the couple.
The drumming and processional celebration is picked up by the guests,
who stand and drum/rattle, etc.
The couple stands before Jill and the assembled company.
Maria Elena moves beside the altar.
JILL offers a greeting & opening prayer to the couple & community.
JILL: Know now before you go further,
that since your lives have crossed in this life
you have formed ties between each other.
As you seek to enter this state of union
you should strive to make real
the ideals which give meaning to this ceremony.
With full awareness, know that within this circle
you are not only declaring your intent to be handfasted
before your friends and family,
but you speak that intent
to the Divine Spirit that guides your lives.
The promises made today and the ties that are bound here
greatly strengthen your union.
Do you still seek to enter this ceremony?
Yes, We Seek to Enter.
JILL: Who brings these two people to this joyful place
in their life journey?
Kay & Cindy thank parents, family & friends
for their support, guidance, and love up to this point in their path,
and ask for their continued support.
JILL: In times past it was believed that the human soul
shared characteristics with all things divine.
It is this belief which assigned virtues
to the cardinal directions: East, South, West and North.
It is in this tradition that a blessing is offered
in support of this ceremony.
JILL: Each of these blessings from the four cardinal directions emphasizes those things which will help you build a happy and successful union. Yet they are only tools, tools which you must use together in order to create what you seek in this union.
I bid you join hands and look into each other's eyes.
Will you cause her pain?
I May
Is that your intent?
No
Will you share each other's pain
and seek to ease it?
Yes
[First cord is draped across the hands]
And so the binding is made.
Will you share her laughter?
Yes
Will you look for the brightness
in life and the positive in each other?
Yes
[Second cord is draped across the hands]
And so the binding is made.
Will you burden her?
I may
Is that your intent?
No
Will you share the burdens of each
so that your spirits may grow in union?
Yes
[Third cord is draped across the hands]
And so the binding is made.
Will you share her dreams?
Yes
Will you dream together
to create new realities and hopes?
Yes
[Fourth cord is draped across the hands]
And so the binding is made.
Will you cause her anger?
I may
Is that your intent?
No
Will you take the heat of anger
and use it to temper the strength of this union?
We Will
[Fifth cord is draped across the hands]
And so the binding is made.
Will you honor her?
I will
Will you seek to never give cause to break that
honor?
We shall never do so
[Sixth cord is draped across the hands]
And so the binding is made.
[Cords are tied together]
The knots of this binding are not formed by these cords
but instead by your vows.
Either of you may drop the cords, for as always,
you hold in your own hands
the making or breaking of this union.
[Cords are removed and placed on altar]
JILL: And now, I require and charge you both,
as you stand in the presence of Divine Love,
before whom the secrets of all hearts are disclosed,
that, having duly considered
the commitment you are about to make,
you do now declare before this company
your pledge of faith, each to the other.
Will you, ________, have _______
to be your spiritual helpmate,
your mind's delight, and your heart's treasure,
And to live together in peace and love?
Will you love her, comfort her, honor and keep her,
in sickness and in health;
and forsaking all other keep only unto her
so long as you both shall live?
I will.
JILL: The ring is the outward and visible sign
of an inward and spiritual grace.
Bless the giving of these rings,
that they who wear them may abide in peace and harmony
and receive the blessing of Divine Love on this union.
In token and pledge
of our constant faith and abiding love,
with this ring I encircle my life with yours.
JILL invites the community to pass the blessing baskets. She explains that Cindy and Kay will burn the bundles later in a ceremony where fire is the element of transformation of wishes into reality, and where the smoke carries each blessing to the Heavens above and the Divine Spirit. Handmaidens pass baskets and return them to altar while Michael plays harp piece.
MARIA ELENA: We call upon all that we hold most sacred to
Bless this union.
We call upon the earth, our planet home, with its beautiful depths
and soaring heights, its vitality and abundance of life,
and together we ask that it
Bless this union.
We call upon the mountains, the green mountains and the white,
and the high valleys and meadows filled with wild flowers,
the snows that never melt, the summits of intense silence,
and we ask that they
Bless this union.
We call upon the waters that rim the earth, horizon to horizon,
that flow in our rivers and streams, that fall upon our gardens and fields,
that fill our ponds and pools,
and we ask that they
Bless this union.
We call upon the land which grows our food, the nurturing soil, the fertile fields,
the abundant gardens and orchards,
and we ask that they
Bless this union.
We call upon the forests, the great trees reaching to the sky
with earth in their roots and heaven in their branches,
the fir and the pine, the cedar and the maple,
and we ask them to
Bless this union.
We call upon the moon and the stars and the sun,
who govern the rhythms and seasons of our lives
and remind us that we are part of a great and wondrous universe,
and we ask them to
Bless this union.
We call upon all those who have lived on this earth,our ancestors and our friends,
who dreamed the best for future generations,
and upon whose lives our lives are built, and with thanksgiving,
we call upon them to
Bless this union.
We call upon the family and friends
and all those who love and cherish and sustain this couple,
and ask that together we
Bless this union.
And lastly, we call upon the power and presence of the Creator,
on that which asks us to become greater than ourselves
so that the one may become two and the two may become one,
and all together we
Bless this union.
MARIA ELENA: Now you will feel no rain,
For each of you will be shelter to the other.
Now you will feel no cold,
For each of you will be warmth to the other.
Now you are two bodies,
But there is only one life before you.
Go now to your dwelling place
To enter into the days of your togetherness
And may your days be good and long upon the earth.
JILL announces the couple as united in love and says "You may kiss your bride."
Drummers stand and drum and follow as Kay and Cindy lead way to the reception.
We pulled together this ceremony from various Web and print sources. Since we've referred back to the handfasting part each year, and since the whole might be of use to others seeking to affirm their commitment, the ritual elements are available as a PDF file.